No Muffin Eating

I was once riding the Tarc.

The end. Or at least it would be if I didn’t insist on creating awkward situations everywhere I go. You see, on campus there is this bakery that sells fantastic muffins, and for a treat I bought myself one, a chocolate chip one, meaning to take it with me the next day. I forgot them of course, and upon the ride home realized that it was an extreme possibility that John would eat my precious snackage before I ever got home.

In order to prevent such a catastrophy I called him.

Me: Hey honey, I was just calling to remind you that you can’t eat my muffin.

John: Muffin? There’s muffins here? Where?

Me: NO! You can’t have my muffin damnit.

John: OOOO that looks tasty.

Me: That’s because it is tasty, and you can’t have it. No Muffin for you. You are cut off from the muffin.

John: Just a bite?

Me: No! Stop begging. It’s my muffin and it is sacred to me. If you can’t respect my muffin rules then you obviusly don’t respect me. NO MUFFIN EATING.

It was at this point I realized everyone was staring at me. More than usual. I also realized that it may not sound entirely like I was talking about a literal chocolate chip muffin.

There’s really too many slang words for a vagina.

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1 Comment (+add yours?)

  1. nosleepandcrazy
    Oct 06, 2012 @ 09:09:13

    There really is too many slang words for vagina, but there are also way too many definitions of muffin

    Reply

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