It’s like The Happening, cept without the creepy old lady

There’s just been something in the motherfucking air.

Don’t believe me? Take a damn look around. Got a friend or family member suffering from depression? Read any blogs? Shit’s running rampant and I, for one, am sick of it.

It’s like that movie “The Happening”. The trees are just spitting depressed oxygen at our faces,  Right in our eyeballs people. How disrespectful is that? In revenge I think I’ll cut down two trees for christmas instead of one. Spit depressed oxygen on me, see how you like it when I take down half your forest!

Except we aren’t all dead, so it’s like even the trees are fucking depressed. So instead of exerting enough energy to kill us all, they’re being lazy and just making us all feel vaguely dead already.

Tree#1: ” Fellow tree, I’m worried about you. You haven’t killed off nearly as many litterbugs as usual. Are you doing ok?”

Tree #2: “I’m fine. Look, I depressed the shit outta that person just five minutes ago.”

Tree #1: “Yeah, but…um…they’re still alive. Aren’t they supposed to be dead or something?”

Tree #2: “Yeah, but I’m kinda tired. I think I need a nap.”

Tree #1: “Well, he does look pretty sad. Maybe we can finish the whole ‘killing them’ thing later.”

Tree#1: “After our nap.”

Tree #2: “Yeah, after a nap.”

I just clawed my way out of the deepest fucking hole I’ve been dropped in for quite some time. Every single day, hysterical crying jags and way too detailed suicidal fantasies, and one too many “Gee if I just stepped in front of that bus”.

Fuck you, brain.

And not in the sexy way.

Hopefully I’m not the only one feeling myself pulling  out of the hole. If you’re still struggling, just remember Depression is a Lying BASTARD. I honestly let myself believe it was never going to dissipate this time. It was that bad. But it did, and it will for you too.

New campaign slogan: “Save A Depressed Person, Cut Down a M. Night ShymalaTree”

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1 Comment (+add yours?)

  1. nosleepandcrazy
    Oct 06, 2012 @ 09:18:48

    That is a very nice slogan

    Reply

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